Disclaimer: All the characters in the story are fictional and bear no resemblance to anybody living or dead. In an attempt to challenge the writer within I might have created characters but the feelings and the emotion exuded are true to my conscience and are as I would have reacted to such a situation.
"You love her, don't you" he said sucking the last drop of beer in the mug. I didn't quite guess what he meant. Even though I hadn't had a sip of alcohol, the dim lights and the soft music made sure I didn't feel its absence. "Love whom....". A chuckle from another got me back to senses. "Oh yeah...and know for certain she does too...we just have to confess that to each other". "Sir, your bill". I thought this had saved me the embarrassment of what I had just blurted out. But not so fast. He grabbed it, dismissed him and looked at me with a what/when/how expression. "Now Mr. Cupid, how do you know what she feels. Did she ever hint that?". (Oh!! Shuks...What did I just do....this is getting outta my hands....why couldn't I have just told him in the first place that we were just good friends). " Hmmm..that doesn't matter anyways 'cos am just gonna say no if at all sucha thing happens".(Haha!!!...The importance of being loved than being in love is so enticing and overpowering..have to put up with the arrogance it brings along). The sound of laughter echoed through the empty bar. A serious and heavy voice said " Now why would you do sucha thing? Have you ever been in love previously or rather have you proposed to someone before?". This blunt question took me aback for a moment and struck a chord somewhere deep and my heart just missed a beat. " Yes, I have" I said involuntarily, still trying to recover. I excused myself and went straight into the loo. The memories of that early morning phone call still haunt me. Can tell you that these morning phone calls are a major irritant for most people and I was no exception. That morning in particular cos I had just returned after watching a late night movie. A sobbing voice called out " RB is that you.." I immediately recognized it and said " Anny, can I call you back. Am not outta my bed as yet". " No..its urgent RB...". My eyes opened up. " You alright?? " " Yes...but Shalini...She..." " What about her? " " She met with an accident last night". She broke down as these words left her mouth. " You alright??" this time it was a male voice. I didn't respond.." Batty ...you alright??" My friends had just paid up the bill and come into the loo. " Yes..yessss" I told them, rinsed my sweating face and walked outta there catching a glimpse of one of them nudging the other not to pursue this topic any further. I was relieved. That night as I lay down on my bed a spate of disjointed memories gushed through my mind.
THEY FIRST MET
"Why in the holy name of God should I write the entrance test to Delhi Engg college. Its not even worth the attempt" I asked my mom. I didn't really expect a response from her as I was in no mood to tolerate nonsense. Your brother gave that exam and he got into IIT and so going by the same logic you give it too. Ahh!! It was anyways too late in the day..or night rather..we had already boarded the train. As always I got down and checked the reservation list stuck on the bogie. As we had booked our tickets at the last moment we got seats at two ends of the same compartment. If only I could use this opportunity, I mused as my eyeballs ran through that list. Shalini...Hmm...sounds Mallu...Anjali..wow...sounds funky and interesting...only two F 18s(Sex-age)...way too less...I joked as I got in. I was too tired and didn't realize when I slept. When I woke up it was already morning and some giggling sounds broke my yawn and I sat up. Two chicks..wooh....but whos who....whatever nice opportunity. I just jumped from my cabin and was greeted by a familiar voice " Surprise!!! I just got my seats exchanged. You were sleeping ..so didn't want to wake you up." " Wow!! How great" I said with a shrunken face as I took the paste in my hand and headed towards the loo. I went two bogies far and turned to the wash basin. This I did so that I could have a puff. I opened the door and felt a cool wind blowing on my face. Perfect weather. I was just 3 cigars old and I didn't know how to light one. Result - matchbox flew. Now what I thought to myself as I chewed the cigar. A voice called out "Lighter??" I turned and my jaws dropped. The same chicks with coffee in their hands!! One was lean and had a perfect body and the other was like me. Not too lean and not too heavy. The latter then lighted my cigarette and it lit to my surprise. I offered her the extra one I had in my pocket. The leaner babe retorted " We quit smoking". What a snub!! I thought. Before I realized the first encounter was over they were gone. I took a long hard puff at it and sighed " What a start to the day". There was more in store. As I walked back to my bogie I saw the same chicks in some serious conversation with my mom. ( Oh gosh!!!! What did I do to deserve sucha punishment). As I retired to my upper berth, I fervently tried to eavesdrop on the conversation going on below and faintly heard a mention of some examination center that sounded familiar(Yeah!!thats mine, but who among you). My excitement was way too loud to go unnoticed. The snub gave me an arrogant smile whereas the other ones' was more pleasant. This didn't escape my mom as she called me below and introduced me to them. " We've already met." they said in chorus.
THE EXAM
Its just amazing when you have closed your minds on one of the institutes, how easy that paper looks irrespective of whether the answers are right or wrong. Finished the paper way before time and came out. Before going to the exams, I noticed a temple aside the center. I decided to spend about half an hour there before my mom could pick me up( No eyebrows raised please ........I was a theist then). I walked in, did the chores and sat in a corner staring at people. Temple or not...we guys never change..In the course of my trajectories a face familiar raced across...the fatter(or not so lean should I say) one with a lighter again....What the **** I thought...I waited for her to finish her prayers and went behind her to have my revenge or talk to her rather. " I thought you quit smoking." I said breathing down her neck. She was taken by surprise and gave me a look which said...forget it. It immediately transpired to a pleasant and mesmerizing smile. " Oh!! Its actually my brother's. I always carry it with me as a good luck charm." A lighter a good luck charm. Now either that was a bad cover up or she was crazy. I am not a mind reader but something told me it was the latter. "I don't notice your friend around, I said trying to start a conversation. " " Oh..Anny got a different center and told me she'd gimme a call once its over." she said fishing for her cell. She became restless as she couldn't find hers. She immediately rushed out of the temple straight into the center leaving me with a blank expression. Why are luck and I always at logger-heads? I thought as I walked out of the temple. She was on the road emptying her purse and more restless. Perfect for the entry of Mr. Nice Guy. I called out to her " Shalini...you seem very disturbed" " Nothing..its my bro's cell and he'll kill me if I lost it." "How I wish I could do the same thing, but its the other way round in my house" I joked. She didn't seem too impressed. " Bad joke!! Sorry about that. But did you bring it in the first place." " The Cafe!!" she exclaimed. "Hi, I am Shalini" she said as I got into the auto beside her. I was suddenly searching for an intro for myself."RB" I said as I shook hands. " Barat??" She looked at me questioningly. Woww...great you remember, I cribbed.." friends call me RB" ( who calls me so??)
LUCK AINT WITH ME
Almost an year had gone by and we were still friends..only friends..our conversations didn't sound so to the tune that they were more clogged by something both of us wanted to say or at the least thats what I thought..It was getting difficult for me and talking to her suddenly became a pain unbearable. I had to put an end to this and I just got the right opportunity. Another visit to the capital and I jumped up and kissed my mom. She was surprised and had a questioning look. " I deserve a break" I said trying to contain my excitement. The final exams finally got over. I was to travel a day later than my mom. Its very difficult giving up a Rajdhani journey to GT. But trains always bode luck for me. As I boarded the train I realized that I wasnt yet prepared what to say and I had just got 16 hrs to go. 32 hrs journey?? Yes it is. But it was so planned cos Shalini was getting into the train at Nagpur which is 16hrs away. ( What a strategy!!) ...5 hrs passed...10..15...20....25...It was way past midnight and we were still chatting the more the conversation went...the more difficult it was for me to see her face. I ultimately called it quits and took the upper berth to sleep. I couldn't sleep but it was far better. Shalini, I want to tell you something. You don't know how much I love you...oh crap...sounds too filmy...I have feelings for you..what shit feelings......no..not the proper word..or just forget it and take her into a lip-lock and say Hows that..kewl idea..and next thing sit in a police station with bare minimum clothes kneeling down...constable saying..Hows that...RB....Shalini's voice..Hey...hang on madam..I am not ready with my dialogues as yet.." RB" I woke up to find her at my feet..waking me up..."Cmon wake up...we got to get down...""but its just 5 in the morning..." Okhla station comes at 5:30 and you don't expect a girl to walk at that time of the morning all alone do you??" Now what...bodyguard...I'd be the first person to run in case of any incident..What a stupid idea..Rajdhani wd have been great fun..I thought as we walked through the empty streets..We didn't speak all the while...I made up my mind and told myself this is going to be it..We reached the bus stand and I said " Shalini, there's something I want to..." I hadn't finished that I saw her yawn and point out at a bus that'll take me home.... " I'd be waiting for you at the theater at 2. I want you to meet a friend of mine." She turned and left. isn't there something called decency and etiquette in this world...How very rude!!!
THE PROPOSAL OR WAS IT??
If any of you have experienced it I needn't tell you that there can be no worse thing than getting tickets in a theater and waiting for the person to come. " Oops I am late" " Oh..not a problem at all..you weren't too long" - 1/2 hr I was made to look like an idiot. We finally got inside. Thank God I thought..she told me that her friend wasn't coming..neither was I too inclined to take tickets for him..Mohabbatein...what a crap movie...and an empty theater...a perfect atmosphere....We were sitting next to each other and her hand was on mine, which was on the handle..not that this was the first time..but this time around I felt the heat inside and my hands trembled.I wanted her to sense it as well. The film progressed and I was getting too restless. She was just 5'6 so I had to stoop down. Now both of our faces were at the same level. "Shal.." I started to be interrupted again " Doesn..." She stopped too. With all the desperation contained I still was a gentleman. " Go on " I said. " Doesn't Aishwarya Rai look beautiful" she said. I looked her in the eye and told her " Not half as beautiful as you are " with all sincerity. Both of us were staring, our eyes just centimeters away. " Itni der kyon kardi( What took you so long)" she managed closing her eyes. "Sheila Dixit ke mukhya mantri banne ka intezaar kar rah tha(waiting for Shiela Dixit to become the CM)" I said. She opened her eyes and laughed. Now all the above said things happened in the interval of 30 seconds in which she closed her eyes for a brief period of 3 seconds. Why was it? Was it a lost opportunity? there was no time for searching answers to questions like that. She held my hands tightly together fingers entangled. Intermission- I saw her face as if for the first time in years and it had the same old pleasant mesmerizing smile I had first seen an year ago. She excused herself to get some snacks and I was all alone. I heaved a sigh of relief and told myself..Did I actually propose to her....no love..no feelings...wow..thats quite a proposal. All these thoughts were cut short by a voice that called out " Hey mate, you made it at last." Ahh..the same person who was standing behind me in the queue at the ticket counter. "Ji??" I looked at him questioningly. " Congrats man" " Congrats RB" a voice called from the other side. Didn't she look familiar. Why wouldnt She..Anjali was standing while Shalini behind her gave a sheepish smile. I had a 36" BOLD ITALIC QUESTION MARK on my face. Was there a hidden camera? Shalini broke it to me " I knew it was going to be today so I brought my friends along. Meet Anjali, whom you already know and Nirupam Sharma, my college mate.
The sound of the clock woke me up and I was staring right into the tube light which I had forgotten to switch off. I managed to get myself up with a lot of trouble and went to grab a bottle of water. It all seemed like it happened just now and 4 years had gone by. I returned to the bed feeling rather lonely. I have known people who have been in love for years. Mine was gunned down by Him even before it blossomed. As I laid down and shut my eyes tightly a speck of tear left the corner of my eye into the cheek. My lips were mumbling something I always wanted to tell her but never could and never will - I love you , Shalini I love you."
Written and directed by
Batty
"You love her, don't you" he said sucking the last drop of beer in the mug. I didn't quite guess what he meant. Even though I hadn't had a sip of alcohol, the dim lights and the soft music made sure I didn't feel its absence. "Love whom....". A chuckle from another got me back to senses. "Oh yeah...and know for certain she does too...we just have to confess that to each other". "Sir, your bill". I thought this had saved me the embarrassment of what I had just blurted out. But not so fast. He grabbed it, dismissed him and looked at me with a what/when/how expression. "Now Mr. Cupid, how do you know what she feels. Did she ever hint that?". (Oh!! Shuks...What did I just do....this is getting outta my hands....why couldn't I have just told him in the first place that we were just good friends). " Hmmm..that doesn't matter anyways 'cos am just gonna say no if at all sucha thing happens".(Haha!!!...The importance of being loved than being in love is so enticing and overpowering..have to put up with the arrogance it brings along). The sound of laughter echoed through the empty bar. A serious and heavy voice said " Now why would you do sucha thing? Have you ever been in love previously or rather have you proposed to someone before?". This blunt question took me aback for a moment and struck a chord somewhere deep and my heart just missed a beat. " Yes, I have" I said involuntarily, still trying to recover. I excused myself and went straight into the loo. The memories of that early morning phone call still haunt me. Can tell you that these morning phone calls are a major irritant for most people and I was no exception. That morning in particular cos I had just returned after watching a late night movie. A sobbing voice called out " RB is that you.." I immediately recognized it and said " Anny, can I call you back. Am not outta my bed as yet". " No..its urgent RB...". My eyes opened up. " You alright?? " " Yes...but Shalini...She..." " What about her? " " She met with an accident last night". She broke down as these words left her mouth. " You alright??" this time it was a male voice. I didn't respond.." Batty ...you alright??" My friends had just paid up the bill and come into the loo. " Yes..yessss" I told them, rinsed my sweating face and walked outta there catching a glimpse of one of them nudging the other not to pursue this topic any further. I was relieved. That night as I lay down on my bed a spate of disjointed memories gushed through my mind.
THEY FIRST MET
"Why in the holy name of God should I write the entrance test to Delhi Engg college. Its not even worth the attempt" I asked my mom. I didn't really expect a response from her as I was in no mood to tolerate nonsense. Your brother gave that exam and he got into IIT and so going by the same logic you give it too. Ahh!! It was anyways too late in the day..or night rather..we had already boarded the train. As always I got down and checked the reservation list stuck on the bogie. As we had booked our tickets at the last moment we got seats at two ends of the same compartment. If only I could use this opportunity, I mused as my eyeballs ran through that list. Shalini...Hmm...sounds Mallu...Anjali..wow...sounds funky and interesting...only two F 18s(Sex-age)...way too less...I joked as I got in. I was too tired and didn't realize when I slept. When I woke up it was already morning and some giggling sounds broke my yawn and I sat up. Two chicks..wooh....but whos who....whatever nice opportunity. I just jumped from my cabin and was greeted by a familiar voice " Surprise!!! I just got my seats exchanged. You were sleeping ..so didn't want to wake you up." " Wow!! How great" I said with a shrunken face as I took the paste in my hand and headed towards the loo. I went two bogies far and turned to the wash basin. This I did so that I could have a puff. I opened the door and felt a cool wind blowing on my face. Perfect weather. I was just 3 cigars old and I didn't know how to light one. Result - matchbox flew. Now what I thought to myself as I chewed the cigar. A voice called out "Lighter??" I turned and my jaws dropped. The same chicks with coffee in their hands!! One was lean and had a perfect body and the other was like me. Not too lean and not too heavy. The latter then lighted my cigarette and it lit to my surprise. I offered her the extra one I had in my pocket. The leaner babe retorted " We quit smoking". What a snub!! I thought. Before I realized the first encounter was over they were gone. I took a long hard puff at it and sighed " What a start to the day". There was more in store. As I walked back to my bogie I saw the same chicks in some serious conversation with my mom. ( Oh gosh!!!! What did I do to deserve sucha punishment). As I retired to my upper berth, I fervently tried to eavesdrop on the conversation going on below and faintly heard a mention of some examination center that sounded familiar(Yeah!!thats mine, but who among you). My excitement was way too loud to go unnoticed. The snub gave me an arrogant smile whereas the other ones' was more pleasant. This didn't escape my mom as she called me below and introduced me to them. " We've already met." they said in chorus.
THE EXAM
Its just amazing when you have closed your minds on one of the institutes, how easy that paper looks irrespective of whether the answers are right or wrong. Finished the paper way before time and came out. Before going to the exams, I noticed a temple aside the center. I decided to spend about half an hour there before my mom could pick me up( No eyebrows raised please ........I was a theist then). I walked in, did the chores and sat in a corner staring at people. Temple or not...we guys never change..In the course of my trajectories a face familiar raced across...the fatter(or not so lean should I say) one with a lighter again....What the **** I thought...I waited for her to finish her prayers and went behind her to have my revenge or talk to her rather. " I thought you quit smoking." I said breathing down her neck. She was taken by surprise and gave me a look which said...forget it. It immediately transpired to a pleasant and mesmerizing smile. " Oh!! Its actually my brother's. I always carry it with me as a good luck charm." A lighter a good luck charm. Now either that was a bad cover up or she was crazy. I am not a mind reader but something told me it was the latter. "I don't notice your friend around, I said trying to start a conversation. " " Oh..Anny got a different center and told me she'd gimme a call once its over." she said fishing for her cell. She became restless as she couldn't find hers. She immediately rushed out of the temple straight into the center leaving me with a blank expression. Why are luck and I always at logger-heads? I thought as I walked out of the temple. She was on the road emptying her purse and more restless. Perfect for the entry of Mr. Nice Guy. I called out to her " Shalini...you seem very disturbed" " Nothing..its my bro's cell and he'll kill me if I lost it." "How I wish I could do the same thing, but its the other way round in my house" I joked. She didn't seem too impressed. " Bad joke!! Sorry about that. But did you bring it in the first place." " The Cafe!!" she exclaimed. "Hi, I am Shalini" she said as I got into the auto beside her. I was suddenly searching for an intro for myself."RB" I said as I shook hands. " Barat??" She looked at me questioningly. Woww...great you remember, I cribbed.." friends call me RB" ( who calls me so??)
LUCK AINT WITH ME
Almost an year had gone by and we were still friends..only friends..our conversations didn't sound so to the tune that they were more clogged by something both of us wanted to say or at the least thats what I thought..It was getting difficult for me and talking to her suddenly became a pain unbearable. I had to put an end to this and I just got the right opportunity. Another visit to the capital and I jumped up and kissed my mom. She was surprised and had a questioning look. " I deserve a break" I said trying to contain my excitement. The final exams finally got over. I was to travel a day later than my mom. Its very difficult giving up a Rajdhani journey to GT. But trains always bode luck for me. As I boarded the train I realized that I wasnt yet prepared what to say and I had just got 16 hrs to go. 32 hrs journey?? Yes it is. But it was so planned cos Shalini was getting into the train at Nagpur which is 16hrs away. ( What a strategy!!) ...5 hrs passed...10..15...20....25...It was way past midnight and we were still chatting the more the conversation went...the more difficult it was for me to see her face. I ultimately called it quits and took the upper berth to sleep. I couldn't sleep but it was far better. Shalini, I want to tell you something. You don't know how much I love you...oh crap...sounds too filmy...I have feelings for you..what shit feelings......no..not the proper word..or just forget it and take her into a lip-lock and say Hows that..kewl idea..and next thing sit in a police station with bare minimum clothes kneeling down...constable saying..Hows that...RB....Shalini's voice..Hey...hang on madam..I am not ready with my dialogues as yet.." RB" I woke up to find her at my feet..waking me up..."Cmon wake up...we got to get down...""but its just 5 in the morning..." Okhla station comes at 5:30 and you don't expect a girl to walk at that time of the morning all alone do you??" Now what...bodyguard...I'd be the first person to run in case of any incident..What a stupid idea..Rajdhani wd have been great fun..I thought as we walked through the empty streets..We didn't speak all the while...I made up my mind and told myself this is going to be it..We reached the bus stand and I said " Shalini, there's something I want to..." I hadn't finished that I saw her yawn and point out at a bus that'll take me home.... " I'd be waiting for you at the theater at 2. I want you to meet a friend of mine." She turned and left. isn't there something called decency and etiquette in this world...How very rude!!!
THE PROPOSAL OR WAS IT??
If any of you have experienced it I needn't tell you that there can be no worse thing than getting tickets in a theater and waiting for the person to come. " Oops I am late" " Oh..not a problem at all..you weren't too long" - 1/2 hr I was made to look like an idiot. We finally got inside. Thank God I thought..she told me that her friend wasn't coming..neither was I too inclined to take tickets for him..Mohabbatein...what a crap movie...and an empty theater...a perfect atmosphere....We were sitting next to each other and her hand was on mine, which was on the handle..not that this was the first time..but this time around I felt the heat inside and my hands trembled.I wanted her to sense it as well. The film progressed and I was getting too restless. She was just 5'6 so I had to stoop down. Now both of our faces were at the same level. "Shal.." I started to be interrupted again " Doesn..." She stopped too. With all the desperation contained I still was a gentleman. " Go on " I said. " Doesn't Aishwarya Rai look beautiful" she said. I looked her in the eye and told her " Not half as beautiful as you are " with all sincerity. Both of us were staring, our eyes just centimeters away. " Itni der kyon kardi( What took you so long)" she managed closing her eyes. "Sheila Dixit ke mukhya mantri banne ka intezaar kar rah tha(waiting for Shiela Dixit to become the CM)" I said. She opened her eyes and laughed. Now all the above said things happened in the interval of 30 seconds in which she closed her eyes for a brief period of 3 seconds. Why was it? Was it a lost opportunity? there was no time for searching answers to questions like that. She held my hands tightly together fingers entangled. Intermission- I saw her face as if for the first time in years and it had the same old pleasant mesmerizing smile I had first seen an year ago. She excused herself to get some snacks and I was all alone. I heaved a sigh of relief and told myself..Did I actually propose to her....no love..no feelings...wow..thats quite a proposal. All these thoughts were cut short by a voice that called out " Hey mate, you made it at last." Ahh..the same person who was standing behind me in the queue at the ticket counter. "Ji??" I looked at him questioningly. " Congrats man" " Congrats RB" a voice called from the other side. Didn't she look familiar. Why wouldnt She..Anjali was standing while Shalini behind her gave a sheepish smile. I had a 36" BOLD ITALIC QUESTION MARK on my face. Was there a hidden camera? Shalini broke it to me " I knew it was going to be today so I brought my friends along. Meet Anjali, whom you already know and Nirupam Sharma, my college mate.
The sound of the clock woke me up and I was staring right into the tube light which I had forgotten to switch off. I managed to get myself up with a lot of trouble and went to grab a bottle of water. It all seemed like it happened just now and 4 years had gone by. I returned to the bed feeling rather lonely. I have known people who have been in love for years. Mine was gunned down by Him even before it blossomed. As I laid down and shut my eyes tightly a speck of tear left the corner of my eye into the cheek. My lips were mumbling something I always wanted to tell her but never could and never will - I love you , Shalini I love you."
Written and directed by
Batty
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